Print measures 3 feet by 4 feet.
Printed on extra-light 20 lb. paper.
+++
Ruby Palmer spent eighteen years as a Crisis Aesthetics Consultant, advising corporations on how to appear composed during situations that were, by every measurable standard, not composed. Her most famous achievement involved convincing an entire executive board to replace a 94-page recovery plan with a single vase of peonies and a longer pause before speaking.
In 2006, Ruby purchased a historic movie theater solely because she disliked the font on its marquee. She restored the building, hosted exactly one screening, and then converted the space into a members-only reading room dedicated to unfinished novels.
She maintained an extensive collection of black umbrellas, each assigned to a specific mood and weather condition. Friends occasionally borrowed one but were required to submit a written explanation afterward.
Ruby had a reputation for arriving precisely seven minutes late to every social function. Not six. Not eight. Seven. When asked why, she explained that punctuality was important, but so was anticipation.
Many people believed Ruby was intimidating.
This was understandable.
Ruby once ended a three-year relationship by sending a handwritten note that simply read, "I think we've both become supporting characters."
The note was later framed.
